where from here?
what are we facing? where do we go from here?
i make no apologies for how i act or behave. i am never sorry for how gay i am. because i've always walked that way, talked that way, fling my arms around that way and i've always loved all of you that way. i never thought anything of it until you made me realise.
i don't remember ever feeling like our friendship is on shaky grounds but last night, i could barely keep myself from falling. i sat there in disbelief. 8 years of friendship and you thought you would know the people you call close friends. but alas, 8 years of friendship really is nothing, because after 8 years, i still have not the slightest clue who we are, who you are, who i am.
i'm not about to change. whether you believe it's for the better or not, i'm not about to change myself. i've never changed myself, my beliefs.. not for you, not for the world, not for anyone. this is me. no matter what. because i know who i am. and as much as you would want us to speak properly or be more grown-up, i refuse to do anything. truth be told, i speak perfectly fine. i know how to carry myself well. i am not bothered by wot others think. because honestly, i'm done bothering about wot people think of me. i'm tired of having to come home and cry whenever someone say something mean or something i didn't like. whenever someone pass a judging glance.. i'm tired of having to care.
i've learnt the hard way, to never let it get that far
and so i act as how i want to act. who cares wot other people think of you? they don't validate you. you validate your own life. whether or not they are judging me, i still lead a more fabulous life than they ever will. because at the end of the day, i'd have my close friends to call on. to spend time with. to have fun with.
don't say i take it all for granted, i am well aware of wot i have. don't think that i am disenchanted, please understand.
but i have insecurities to hide. don't you know? the louder the person is, the more he has to hide? i guess not.
argh. i just wish this whole thing will just blow over. i can't take this. i love you guys too much.
i make no apologies for how i act or behave. i am never sorry for how gay i am. because i've always walked that way, talked that way, fling my arms around that way and i've always loved all of you that way. i never thought anything of it until you made me realise.
i don't remember ever feeling like our friendship is on shaky grounds but last night, i could barely keep myself from falling. i sat there in disbelief. 8 years of friendship and you thought you would know the people you call close friends. but alas, 8 years of friendship really is nothing, because after 8 years, i still have not the slightest clue who we are, who you are, who i am.
i'm not about to change. whether you believe it's for the better or not, i'm not about to change myself. i've never changed myself, my beliefs.. not for you, not for the world, not for anyone. this is me. no matter what. because i know who i am. and as much as you would want us to speak properly or be more grown-up, i refuse to do anything. truth be told, i speak perfectly fine. i know how to carry myself well. i am not bothered by wot others think. because honestly, i'm done bothering about wot people think of me. i'm tired of having to come home and cry whenever someone say something mean or something i didn't like. whenever someone pass a judging glance.. i'm tired of having to care.
i've learnt the hard way, to never let it get that far
and so i act as how i want to act. who cares wot other people think of you? they don't validate you. you validate your own life. whether or not they are judging me, i still lead a more fabulous life than they ever will. because at the end of the day, i'd have my close friends to call on. to spend time with. to have fun with.
don't say i take it all for granted, i am well aware of wot i have. don't think that i am disenchanted, please understand.
but i have insecurities to hide. don't you know? the louder the person is, the more he has to hide? i guess not.
argh. i just wish this whole thing will just blow over. i can't take this. i love you guys too much.
the holy book (revised) @ 6:53 AM
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